Santa: This weight of mine is really strange. Banta: What's with it? Santa: Every time I lose it, it finds me again.
Immediately after his annual examination, Santa with a multitude of problems asked anxiously, "Doctor, how do I stand?" "That's what puzzles me!" replied the doctor.
Jeeto yelled at Santa, "You're gonna be really SORRY. I'm going to LEAVE you!" Santa: Make up your mind. Which is it gonna be?
Santa: Good evening! Thought I'd drop in and see you about the umbrella you borrowed from me last week. Banta: I'm sorry, but I lent it to a friend of mine. Were you wanting it? Santa: Well, not for myself, but the fellow I borrowed it from says the owner wants it!
Santa: What do you want for your birthday? Jeeto: A divorce. Santa: I wasn't thinking of spending that much!